July 15th, 2009 at 10:38am
Under Family Law
If you live in South Carolina and you are going through a divorce you need to hire an experienced divorce attorney because you will need legal advice. Hiring an experienced and dedicated attorney is the best option if you are looking at paying alimony, fighting for child custody, and much more. There are five grounds for divorce in this state, as well as jurisdictional and venue requirements.
When you hire a family law attorney for a child custody issue you are making a good decision. There are multiple factors that courts look at when considering custody which an attorney can help you with. The court process can be very stressful on children as well as the parties. When you use a professional staff experienced with divorce they can help you understand the court process and advise you of your rights throughout the entire process.
When you are going through a divorce you may have problems with mediation and agreeing to certain things in the divorce like the amount of money you have to pay or should receive for alimony and child support. You might feel you deserve custody also. Mediation is when you will sit with a court appointed professional staff that will try and make the both of you come to agreements about the divorce. Mediation is required in many South Carolina counties in divorce, child custody cases, alimony and property division, as well and other states around the nation. An attorney can help you work through agreements and possibly bypass the mediation process in the courts. Alternately if you hire an attorney who also a certified mediator, you get the benefits of both legal advise and/or mediation services, depending on your needs.
Hiring a family law attorney can help you come to agreements with your spouse during the divorce process. You do not want to fight and be bitter through the process because it can cause you to lose rights. However, if one of the parties is impossible to work with then the judge may recognize this. An attorney can help make the process more fair when it comes to alimony payments and if you even have to pay anything, child support and visitation and more.
Consulting with an experienced attorney when you are going through a divorce, legal separation, child custody, child support, adoption, alimony or property division in South Carolina is the best option you can chose. You need to consider a family law attorney because the entire process can be too stressful to endure on your own and you may lose valuable grounds by waiting. The consultation allows you to gather sufficient information to protect your family and find out your rights. Finding an experienced and dedicated attorney will help you ensure the outcome is fair and at the best interest of the child. An attorney can help you calculate alimony payments if you should have to pay them, get the most time in visitation or even full custody, and help with mediation. You need a professional staff to work with you through the entire process. It can even help to speed up the entire process by coming to agreements with the other party.
By Law Article
July 13th, 2009 at 08:54pm
Under Child Custody
Dr. Bricklin and Dr. Elliot are nationally-known child custody experts. They have written many publications offering help and guidance for mothers, fathers, and grandparents involved in child custody issues. Their publications can be found at http://www.custodylibrary.com
One of the saddest and most frustrating situations occurs when a child has been bribed or manipulated to turn against one of the parents. The child might previously have had a wonderful relationship with the so-called “target parent.” Manipulations can range from very subtle, like the parent who looks sad and distressed when the child goes off to visit the other parent, right on through the entire spectrum to the other extreme, where the parent actively damns and condemns the target parent. The parent will say things like, “It’s all his fault; he deserted us,” right on through to saying that the target parent has all kinds of drug problems or alcohol problems or that he or she left us to run off with some low-life.
Unfortunately, subtle forms of bribing or manipulating a child will work as well as the more blatant strategies. In fact, the subtle ways work best, because even a savvy child, who might recognize (and better deal with) blatant alienation, will not recognize more subtle forms. It might be a mother, for example, who says: “Well you know you’re father; he has a drinking problem. He tries, but he really is just an alcoholic.” Or the father who says, “You know your mom; she means well but is just so uptight you can’t have any fun around her.” These kinds of subtle strategies might work every bit as well as the more blatant ones.
First of all, the target parent must learn to recognize situations that look like a bribed or manipulated child, but in actuality is not. It is frequent for older children, for example, say from twelve years of age and up, to basically want to have one home. It simply is a matter of convenience for them. They want to be around the friends with whom they socialize.
Also, a child of older years may simply want to switch from where he or she already lives to the other house, based on the-grass-is-always-greener-on-the-other-side-of-the-street. This is the child who believes the “other house” is the place where he or she can stay up later, where there is less discipline, less insistence on cleanliness, less insistence on chores or homework.
Regardless of the cause of a child’s not wanting to see you, the core skill needed is what we call non-adversary communication. This is a skill which we also teach to businesses. It is a very powerful tool, but very subtle in its power. It will sound simple enough when we run the rules by you, but it will take a little bit of dedicated practice to use it well.
First, you must see the value in using it. It brings two main benefits. One benefit is that it will make your own communications more powerful. Second, it is tremendously self-therapeutic. It would take us too far off point to explain this fully right here, but the fact is that any piece of “output behavior,” an angry face, tight vocal-cord muscles, a tense body, accesses in you your worst and most fearful memories at an unconscious level, memories of times you felt helpless and scared. You are unwittingly hurting yourself.
The first principal is that whatever the issue is you are dealing with, you immediately seek a solution.
This next point is extremely hard for most people to implement. It simply states that you never blame or make the other person wrong, not even in the slightest way. No matter how angry, hurt, or vindictive you feel, you do not use a time where some problem needs a solution to air your anger. There are not only blatant ways of making the other person wrong e.g., “You idiot! You never understand anything!” There are also subtle ways. The use of the word “but” is subtly making the other person wrong. If you tell me your position, and if I answer you, even in a very gentle and warm voice, with a phrase that starts with the word “but,” you know that shortly thereafter I am going to make your position “wrong.”
Suppose one of my children says to me: “You always talk to me in a loud voice.”
Suppose I answer: “But honey, it is so hard to get your attention.”
The third point is to learn to not give more than one (short) explanation of your own position. To do so is not only strategically ineffective, but self-damaging. When you spend a lot of motor-output time trying to justify your position, that is, trying to get the other person to accept the wisdom of your explanation, you are accessing in yourself, at an unconscious level, all of the memories of when you felt helpless, vulnerable, misunderstood and “on the carpet.” Here are some brief examples of non-adversary statements. Instead of saying “You’re late every time you drop Mary off,” (making the other person wrong), say: “What can we do to make drop-offs and pick-ups work better for all of us?”
We absolutely know your thinking at this point: “You don’t know my ex. He wants to hurt me! He doesn’t care about solving anything!” We know this might very well be true. But what you don’t know, and we do, is the subtle, cumulative power of the strategies we want to share with you. Give us a chance. Master them, and try them before judging how you think they will work. Further, our purpose here is to teach you how to use these skills with your children, especially those from whom you may have been alienated.
This skill of non-adversarial communication is necessary to make most of the other strategies that you might use work better. It is an amazingly powerful tool when used the ways we will describe. It is so subtle that the other person might not even consciously know you are using it. But it definitely moves people off of aggressive or hostile positions. Here are some other examples. Take the, child who complains the parent speaks too loudly.
The parent might respond to such an accusation with: “You may be right. Help me to find better ways to get your full attention.” Now, since the child has no position to bother defending (which would have been the case had the parent said, “You don’t pay attention,” to which the child would have said, “Yes, I do,” and the conversation would go nowhere), the child can begin wondering what options the parent may have to get his or her attention without yelling. As long as anyone has to defend a position, no creative thinking goes on. As soon as you make someone wrong, all they will do is endlessly explain to you why they’re not; we are genetically engineered, one might say to “defend our territory.” It is an almost irresistible urge.
The final strategy, but one which we recommend you do not use until you have thoroughly tried the others is to seek help through the legal system. This is something you definitely would like to avoid, unless there are no other options available. You will have to initiate these steps through your attorney. There are two important pieces of information you may need, since not all attorneys are aware of the mental health options that may be available and not all options will be available in every state.
Dr. Bricklin and Dr. Elliot are nationally-known child custody experts. They have written many publications offering help and guidance for mothers, fathers, and grandparents involved in child custody issues. Their publications can be found at http://www.custodylibrary.com
Authors:
Dr. Barry Bricklin is a psychologist in private practice, Adjunct Associate Professor at Widener University and has previously served on the faculty of Jefferson University and of Hahnneman University. He is past president of the Philadelphia Society for Personality Assessment and the Philadelphia Society of Clinical Psychologists. He has authored books and articles many topics related to custody evaluations. For over 25 years, Dr. Bricklin has developed various data-based approaches to the decisions which must be made when parents divorce. He is the Chair of the Executive Operating Committee of the Professional Academy of Custody Evaluators (PACE).
Dr. Gail Elliot is Head, Child Development and Family Processes Research, Bricklin Associates, the Vice Chair of the Professional Academy of Custody Evaluators and a psychologist in private practice. She has served as a consultant to public and private schools and coordinated multidisciplinary treatment plans. She has authored and researched numerous works related to custody evaluation.
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Dr. Bricklin and Dr. Elliot are nationally-known child custody experts. They have written many publications offering help and guidance for mothers, fathers, and grandparents involved in child custody issues. Their publications can be found at http://www.custodylibrary.com
Dr. Barry Bricklin is a psychologist in private practice, Adjunct Associate Professor at Widener University and has previously served on the faculty of Jefferson University and of Hahnneman University. He is past president of the Philadelphia Society for Personality Assessment and the Philadelphia Society of Clinical Psychologists. He has authored books and articles many topics related to custody evaluations. For over 25 years, Dr. Bricklin has developed various data-based approaches to the decisions which must be made when parents divorce. He is the Chair of the Executive Operating Committee of the Professional Academy of Custody Evaluators (PACE).
Dr. Gail Elliot is Head, Child Development and Family Processes Research, Bricklin Associates, the Vice Chair of the Professional Academy of Custody Evaluators and a psychologist in private practice. She has served as a consultant to public and private schools and coordinated multidisciplinary treatment plans. She has authored and researched numerous works related to custody evaluation.
By Law Article
July 13th, 2009 at 02:53am
Under Child Custody
Like most states, the standard for child custody determinations in California is the overall best interest of the child with an emphasis on assuring the “health, safety, and welfare” of the child and “frequent and continuing contact” with both parents absent child abuse, domestic violence, or where the contact would not be in the best interest of the child as provided in the California family code section 3011 (See California Family Code Section 3011, 3020, 3040, 3080). Further, according to California family code section 3040, child custody should be granted in an order of preference and according to the best interest of the child.
A common challenge for the court is to decide who will get custody of the child. Child custody may be petitioned by parents, grandparents, stepparents, or any person who believes they can provide suitable care and guidance to the child. So how does the California family court or a California judge handle competing persons seeking custody of the child? According to California family code section 3040, child custody should be granted in an order of preference and according to the best interest of the child. The court looks first to grant custody to both parents jointly or to either parent before looking to grant custody to other persons. California however does not currently establish a preference or a presumption for or against joint custody arrangements. Instead, it allows the California family court or California judge to make the parenting arrangement decision on a case-by-case basis according to what it believes reflects the overall best interest of the child. If neither parent is granted custody, then the court may look towards the person’s home in which the child has been living and the stability of that environment and then to any person deemed by the court to be able to provide appropriate care for the child. In short, the court will typically look to grant child custody first to the parents according the best interest of the child and if they are deemed unfit the court will then look to grant child custody to other persons according to the best interest of the child.
If you are involved in a child custody battle with the other parent, grandparent, stepparent, or any other person, you would be wise to consult a California family law attorney to help you learn where you stand legally and what your legal options are with respect to your child custody rights and visitation rights.
Copyright © 2007 Child Custody Coach
Child Custody Coach supplies information, online materials, and coaching services to parents in the field of child custody, namely, divorce, child custody and visitation, child custody evaluations, 730 evaluations, parenting, and all issues related to child custody and divorce.
“How to Win Child Custody – Proven Strategies that can Win You Custody and Save You Thousands in Attorney Cost!” is a unique child custody strategy guide written by The Custody Coach and made available by
Child Custody Coach in an easy to read, understand, and apply E-Book format. Custody Match is an online consumer and family law attorney matching service to help you in your search for the right attorney for your divorce or child custody case.
Custody Match can help you find the right family law attorney, divorce lawyer, or child custody attorney in your area.
By Law Article
July 11th, 2009 at 02:54am
Under Child Custody
For many divorced and separated parents with children there will be a common answer as to why they ended up with the child custody and visitation arrangement they have. The answer being, “the judge decided it.” In other words, the judge chose the parenting arrangement you have based on his/her belief of what was in your child’s best interest.
Judges do not always make the child custody decision or choose the parenting plan arrangement for the parent’s. In fact, more often than not, the judge will not make the child custody decision for the parent’s. It is usually when the parent’s are unable to reach an agreement on child custody the judge will choose the parenting arrangement for them. If the judge makes the child custody decision for the parent’s it is often referred to as a final judicial order or judgment on child custody.
Parents typically know what’s best for their children including decisions about child custody and visitation. The difficulty for the parents is often the inability to set apart their own emotions and wishes from the needs of the child. Parents are typically given the greatest amount of flexibility in choosing a parenting plan that reflects the best interest of their child. However, when the parent’s are unable to come to an agreement on child custody and visitation the judge will often be given the task to make the decision about child custody and will also have a tremendous amount of leeway in choosing a parenting plan the he/she thinks is best for the child. This leaves vast room for a judge’s interpretation of what is in the best interest of the child and often leads to arbitrary judicial decisions regarding child custody and visitation.
When the court or judge chooses a parenting plan for the parent’s it will usually result in one or both parents being disappointed or feeling a sense of loss. Typically one parent will feel as though they won child custody while the other parent felt they lost child custody. It’s also not uncommon that both parents end up disappointed with the court or judges decision. Rarely both parents feel as though they won when the court or judge makes the child custody decision.
To avoid arbitrary judicial child custody decision made by the court and judges you would be wise to learn more about how child custody decisions are made and the laws in your particular state. How judges have ruled in the past and what influences his/her decisions. Additionally, you will want to explore alternative dispute resolution options such as child custody mediation, collaborative law, and arbitration. If you are seeking legal advice on how to proceed with your child custody case you can consult a family law attorney in your area who spends a significant amount of his/her practice representing clients on child custody cases.
Copyright © 2007 Child Custody Coach
Child Custody Coach supplies information, online materials, and coaching services to parents in the field of child custody, namely, divorce, child custody and visitation, child custody evaluations, 730 evaluations, parenting, and all issues related to child custody and divorce.
“How to Win Child Custody – Proven Strategies that can Win You Custody and Save You Thousands in Attorney Cost!” is a unique child custody strategy guide written by The Custody Coach and made available by
Child Custody Coach in an easy to read, understand, and apply E-Book format. Custody Match is an online consumer and family law attorney matching service to help you in your search for the right attorney for your divorce or child custody case.
Custody Match can help you find the right family law attorney, divorce lawyer, or child custody attorney in your area.
By Law Article
July 10th, 2009 at 08:54pm
Under Civil Rights Law
Devoted and loving father John Murtari received a feeding tube today, and says he’s relieved. Murtari, founder of A Kids Right, is carrying through with his passive resistence of not eating or drinking to highlight the need for family law reform, the civil rights of noncustodial parents and equal parenting.
Murtari’s health started to deteriorate soon after he turned himself into the Jamesville Correctional Facility in New York July 31. He lost twenty-eight pounds in 9 days, had such low blood pressure the medical personnel couldn’t get a diastolic reading, had uncontrollable shakes, and was starting to have trouble finishing a sentence. He agreed to cooperate with the doctors when he was told they’d be giving him a feeding tube, so he’s had approximately 30 ounces of water and 2 nutritional supplements since he was moved to the Onondaga County Justice Center August 3rd.
Murtari has been charged with willful failure to pay child support, even though he says he’s been paying as much as he can afford. His child support order was calculated by using the salary of a previous job, at twice the income he makes now.
This practice of imputing income has thrown many noncustodial parents into arrears, threatening their drivers’ and business licenses, and their freedom, like in Murtari’s case. What was once created to protect the children of “deadbeat” parents is now turning average people; normal, loving, responsible, law-abiding parents of both genders, into criminals.
A rally was held in front of the Onondaga County Courthouse yesterday on the International Day of Demonstration for John Murtari and Equal Parenting. Demonstrators came from as far away as Canada, and from all over New York.
Kris Titus of Fathers4Justice/Canada was dressed as Wonder Woman and Jim Hayes of Fathers and Families New York was dressed as “the elephant in the room.” Joel Benjamin, member of Fathers4Justice/USA, Tammy Bowman, member of the New York Civil Rights Council, Guy Lavigne of Fathers4Justice/Canada, Jennifer Kuhn of the National Coalition of Free Men/Greater New York, Mark Young of Exiled Fathers/Virginia and Chris Shaw of the Children Equal Parenting Association of Canada were also present. Several television crews stopped by and interviewed participants, and two articles have been published in newspapers. (links below)
In a show of support for Murtari and Equal Parenting, photos have been sent to the Purple Ribbon Campaign from all over the world. (Purple is known as the color of equality.) Family law reform advocacy, and activism, is occurring in dozens of countries, where a common phrase is, “The best parent is both parents.”
Post Standard – August 10 – Jailed Activist Refusing Food
Finger Lake Times – August 10 – Lyons Man Refuses Food, Water
By Law Article
July 10th, 2009 at 02:53pm
Under Child Custody
Child custody is a legal term that is often used by the family courts to describe the rights and responsibilities of divorced parents and their minor children, the residency or placement of the children, and the relationship and/or amount of contact the children have with each parent. When divorced parents are unable to agree on such issues, the family courts are often left with the difficult task of determining the best custodial arrangement of the children and parenting plan for the parents. The more parents understand what is involved in child custody determinations the more informed they will be in making decisions regarding their children after a divorce.
Rights and responsibilities of the parents
The rights and responsibilities of each parent to their minor children includes decisions regarding the raising and general welfare of the children on issues such as the childrenâs education, medial care, dental care, and religion. Such rights and responsibilities are commonly referred to as legal custody of the children.
Residency or placement of the children
The residency or placement of children refer to where the children will live and spend majority of his/her time. Often times a child will live with one parent more than the other parent and the parent that the child lives with the most will typically be responsible for the day-to-day care of the child. In some cases, the child will live equally with both parents, close to equally with both parents, or live a significant amount of time with each parent and the parents will share in the responsibilities and day-to-day care of the child. The residency or placement of child and day-to-day care of the child are commonly referred to as physical custody of the children.
Relationship and/or amount of contact the children have with each parent
In the case where the child resides or lives primarily with one parent, the time spent with the other parent is often referred to as visitation. The parent that the child lives with more is often referred to as the custodial parent and the parent with visitation is referred to as the noncustodial parent. In such cases, the noncustodial parent will typically have a visitation schedule that describes his/her contact with the children. The visitation schedule is sometimes referred to as a parenting arrangement.
When divorced parents are unable to agree on the rights and responsibilities of the parents and their minor children, the residency or placement of the children, and the relationship and/or amount of contact the children have with each parent, the family courts are often left with the difficult task of determining the best custodial arrangement of the children and parenting plan for the parents. The more parents understand what is involved in child custody determinations the more informed they will be in making decisions regarding their children after a divorce.
© 2007 Child Custody CoachChild Custody Coach supplies information, online materials, and coaching services to parents in the field of child custody, namely, divorce, child custody and visitation, child custody evaluations, 730 evaluations, parenting, and all issues related to child custody and divorce. “How to Win Child Custody – Proven Strategies that can Win You Custody and Save You Thousands in Attorney Cost!” is a unique child custody strategy guide written by The Custody Coach and made available by Child Custody Coach in an easy to read, understand, and apply E-Book format. Custody Match is an online consumer and family law attorney matching service to help you in your search for the right attorney for your divorce or child custody case. Custody Match can help you find the right family law attorney, divorce lawyer, or child custody attorney in your area.
By Law Article
July 10th, 2009 at 08:54am
Under Child Custody
If you ask to your friend or your colleagues, most of them will tell you that grandparents do not have no common law right to see their grandchildren if the parents object. And for the most part, all these people are right in some respects. Interestingly, there is no basis in constitutional law regarding grandparent visitation rights in the United States. However it is interesting to know that grandparents can be entitled to visitation rights with grandchildren in some cases.
In order for a grandparent to obtain such visitation rights, the grandparent may have to present evidence to the court that the absence of visitation rights would be harmful or detrimental to the child’s health and welfare. Considering that that parents have a fundamental right to the care, custody and management of their child, the grandparent generally has to show that there is a sufficient reason for the court to interfere with the parent’s right to for such external interference to be imposed. Therefore it is often difficult to prove such harm to the child. Some courts or judges may also fear that allowing grandparents an external visitation right could be harmful to the parental authority. It could also create intergenerational disputes which could be even more detrimental to the child and/or be contrary to the child’s best interest. Therefore, courts often recommend that parent and grandparents reach an agreement out of court.
Under specific circumstances grandparents can be granted custody rights of the child. When one parent is deceased the other surviving parent is typically preferred to obtain the custody of the child if deemed fit. But if both parents are deceased, the courts may decide to award the custody of the child to the grandparents since a blood relative is often preferred to obtain custody. Even in this situation, the grandparent has to present key evidence to the court that the child would be better off if he/she had custody of the child compared to other blood relatives or third parties. The courts can make their decision taking into account the age, health and financial ability of the grandparent to properly support and care for the child.
There are many restrictions and limitations in which the court can order or grant grandparent visitation rights. Additionally, the laws related to grandparent visitation rights are sometimes changing and developing. To learn the latest laws and developments in your area with respect to grandparent rights to child custody and visitation you may want to consult an attorney in your jurisdiction who can advise you legally.
© 2007 Child Custody CoachChild Custody Coach supplies information, online materials, and coaching services to parents in the field of child custody, namely, divorce, child custody and visitation, child custody evaluations, 730 evaluations, parenting, and all issues related to child custody and divorce. “How to Win Child Custody – Proven Strategies that can Win You Custody and Save You Thousands in Attorney Cost!” is a unique child custody strategy guide written by The Custody Coach and made available by Child Custody Coach in an easy to read, understand, and apply E-Book format. Custody Match is an online consumer and family law attorney matching service to help you in your search for the right attorney for your divorce or child custody case. Custody Match can help you find the right family law attorney, divorce lawyer, or child custody attorney in your area.
By Law Article
July 9th, 2009 at 08:54pm
Under Child Custody
When a divorce or dissolution of marriage is brought before the family court, child visitation is considered at the same time and according to similar factors as child custody. The term stands for the time in which the non-custodial parent is allowed to meet or visit with his/her child. However, under certain circumstances a parent can be denied child visitation or child custody in the case of sole physical custody. Child visitation is often associated with the term “parenting plan,” which typically outlines the type of legal custody and physical custody of each parent and can also define when the child is to visit or be with the non-custodial parent. Parents can reach such an agreement on their own, this is the best case, or the court can decide on this matter, which is often the worst case scenario.
Typically, the best situation for a child in a divorce, child custody, and child visitation matter is when both parents manage to solve their personal differences to reach an agreement or parenting plan or child visitation schedule out of court. In this case, any agreements reached between both parents can become the parenting plan. When a parenting plan is created and child visitation and child custody issues are resolved, it may not require anymore matters to be brought to the court even if the child is very young. A decade ago, the family courts would often give infant visitation guidelines preventing the non-custodial parent from spending a lot of time with his/her child. Such provisions are not valid anymore, but rather frequent and continuous contact with both parents is encouraged. Off court agreements does not necessarily need to be translated in a written contract and signed by both parents. However, parents may be well advised to have a written and signed parenting plan for future reference in case a child custody or child visitation dispute arises. It can also be used as a stipulation between both parties and then issued as a court order for future enforcement purposes.
Now, what if the parents are not able to reach an agreement on child visitation or child custody? Both parents will often be required to participate in a mediation process before having a court hearing or before a judge hears the case. Typically, the two parents will be assisted to work out a parenting plan by a third-party or mediator, who can be an experienced attorney or social worker. Many child visitation and child custody issues find a happy ending through mediation sessions resulting in a parenting plan agreement, which can then be presented as a stipulation ad then as a court order.
Generally, the worst case is when mediation fails. In this situation, the next step is typically for a court hearing in order to solve the issues. Judges nowadays often require custody evaluations of the family by experts in the field of child psychiatry, psychology or mental health. Licensed social workers can also be called to present evidence for consideration by the court. Once all pieces of evidence have been presented, the court will typically make its decision. This is the worst case child custody and child visitation dispute method because it can be very complex, expensive, and long-draw out. In some highly contested child custody and child visitation cases, child custody and child visitation disputes will eventually result in denying child custody and child visitation rights to one of the parent.
© 2007 Child Custody CoachChild Custody Coach supplies information, online materials, and coaching services to parents in the field of child custody, namely, divorce, child custody and visitation, child custody evaluations, 730 evaluations, parenting, and all issues related to child custody and divorce. “How to Win Child Custody – Proven Strategies that can Win You Custody and Save You Thousands in Attorney Cost!” is a unique child custody strategy guide written by The Custody Coach and made available by Child Custody Coach in an easy to read, understand, and apply E-Book format. Custody Match is an online consumer and family law attorney matching service to help you in your search for the right attorney for your divorce or child custody case. Custody Match can help you find the right family law attorney, divorce lawyer, or child custody attorney in your area.
By Law Article