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What to do regarding sexual harassment?


A friend of mine (male) was sexually harassed by his male co-employee during an office party. He doesn't know this guy. This happened on a Sunday. When he went back to work on Monday, the one who harassed him kept passing by his work station. We don't know why.

As per his boss' (and mine, too) advice, he went to the HR dept. The HR person said that his case was unusual and that they are kind of "stuck" -- in short, doesn't know what to do. This really upsets us because my friend is the one who needs some kind of justice and protection from the harasser (if there is such a word) but the company can't even protect him just because the case is UNUSUAL.

Now, the harasser filed a counter-affidavit saying that it was my male friend who harassed him! The nerve!

xcess: My male friend is not gay but he is usually mistaken as such because he is rather "effeminate".

Please help. I'll add details if necessary. No nonsense answers pls.

IF your friend reported this incident at work and they replied they can't do anything, he can contact the Human Relations Office in his state. It is their job to investigate complaints of employment discrimination and violations of the Federal Civil Rights Act, in adddition to any state laws that might have been violated. Be aware that if it is simply a he said/he said situation, they may not be able to do anything. Also, remember that retaliation by the company for exercising these rights to report is also illegal, so if they do anything, he can file a complaint against them too.

if the company you work for won't do anything then have your friend file a sexual harrassment complaint with the police department in the city where you live

Seems it is a "he said he said" situation. what did you expect the alleged harasser to do, admit his offenses?

What exactly was the "harassment?" If it involved physical acts then your friend could consider criminal charges, but then it gets to be a more serious "he said he said" situation.

Where there witnesses? If not, just avoid the other person, but document any unwelcome encounters such as the "passing by" with times and dates.

I know the feeling. When its a man with this people look at it as a joke and dont want to take it seriously. We had some nonsense like that going on where i work a number of years back. The victim (a male) went to the office to complain about it. They more or less told him to get back to work and shut up, not to worry about it. So he did the next step. Went and got a lawyer and sued the company. Yeah, he lost his job but he won his case.
Another time i had a gay guy at work who kept coming onto me. After warning him a few times with no luck i finally had enough, grabbed the guy, drew my fist back and came 1 second from punching his lights out before i caught myself. Had i did it I would have been the one to get fired. It worked, the guy didnt mess with me again but still yet i wouldnt recommend anyone resort to violence. it will only get you in trouble in the end.

Either you are being very vague or you don't really know what happened.

Specify what type of harrassment.
Specify what your friend did to stop it.
Specify what part of "passing by his work station" constitutes harrassment.

It's great to support your friend, but you gotta have facts and specifics.

good luck hes needs to keep notes time dates and even a tape recorder to prove his case

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